The Rescue squad!
by awkwardhope
Summary: Yui's been kidnapped, Ayato wants to form a rescue squad, Subaru's being tsundere again and Shu fears being tasered


**SO. I decided to write a Diabolik Lovers fic, and I didn't make it very serious**

**Okay it isn't serious at all XDD But here we have Ayato, Subaru and Shu (ma bebes 3) in an unlikely situation of OOC proportions! (*isn't able to write anybody in character ;w;)**

**And YES, I do ship all of those smexy men with Yui, Ayato the most, so there's summa that sprinkled here and there owo And some matureness-kind-of but not in a lemony-lemon kind of way XD (*is too chicken)**

**LET'S GET THIS STARTEDDD~~~~  
**

**DISCLAIMER- I don't own any of the Diabolik smexies or Yui ;u;**

All six Sakamaki brothers were gathered in the lounge. Why? Only Ayato knew, since he was the one who dragged everyone down. Except Shu, who was already dozing on the couch.

"Ayato, what do you want." Reiji deadpanned.

Kanato rubbed his eyes. "I want to leave."

"I have brought you all here for a reason!" The redhead announced.

"And that reason is?" Shu cracked open one eye.

"Yui is nowhere to be found."

"Yui! Well, isn't this abnormal to be calling bitch-chan by her name, Ayato-kun!"

"SHADDAP LAITO."

"And? What about it?" Subaru asked, his hand clenched.

"I have deducted that she has been KIDNAPPED."

Every wondered how Ayato knew such a word.

Subaru punched the wall, developing a brand new hole among all the others. Typical Subaru.

"By whom?" Shu muttered.

"I dunno yet. WHICH IS WHY I WANT TO FORM A RESCUE SQUAD!"

"A rescue squad?" Reiji pushed his glasses up his nose like the intellectual being he was. "I refuse to take part in such useless drabble, especially since I couldn't care less what happens to that uncouth human."

Kanato was already up the stairs.

"Too much of a pain. Leave bitch-chan outside my room when you retrieve her!"

"LIKE HELL!" Ayato barked.

"I'll go." This unexpected volunteer came from Subaru.

"And Shu?"

"Might as well." He ran a hand through his dishevelled hair. "Since you woke me up."

"ALRIGHT! EVERYONE, RESCUE SQUAD FORMATION!"

"No."

Thusly, Ayato, Subaru and Shu embarked on an epic journey to save Yui, while the remaining vampires couldn't care less.

* * *

Meanwhile, Yui was locked in a dark chamber, her hands and legs chained. She had no idea how she had got here, and who took her. But one thing she did know is that she would spend the rest of her days here. Why would anyone come? They'd just get another human to eat. It wasn't as though any of them actually liked her anyway. She sighed.

Her neck hurt like hell. She must have been taken by a vampire. Of course. She hadn't seen any humans, maybe the butler. Was the butler a vampire too? Oh, how she longed to see her own species again.

The door opened.

"Hello." Greeted her captor. "How do you like the room?"

"I'm claustrophobic." She told him in a small voice.

"You'll have to get used to it."

"Why did you kidnap me?"

"Because I wanted your blood."

_How blunt._

"It's delicious, by the way. I helped myself earlier."

"I noticed..."

"You'll be here for a long time. I'm not giving you up easily."

"I know..."

"Actually, there is another reason why I kidnapped you." He proceeded to spout a long story about something that Ayato did to him when they were younger and how he wanted revenge or something.

"But he doesn't like me."

"He kissed you in the pool."

"You saw that?!"

"I'm the Student Council president. That whole school is wired with security cameras. _Even in the pool_."

Yui shuddered.

"Well, I think I'll bite you again. You mind?"

"Actually, I d-"

"Nobody cares!" He exclaimed before unceremoniously stabbing her neck with his fangs. Oh God, the pain! She felt every drop of blood in her being sucked out like a vacuum cleaner. He finally stopped when he realised that she was unconscious. "Whoops."

* * *

The rescue squad, after going on a long and painful walk full of bickering, finally arrived at a mansion where Yui's scent ended.

"Ours is better." Shu commented.

"So, how do we approach?" Subaru inquired.

"WE BARGE IN, KILL THE BASTARD AND LEAVE WITH WHAT'S RIGHTFULLY MINE!"

"What the- who said anything about Yui being rightfully yours?!"

"She is! She's Yours Truly's property."

"You don't treat her gently like I do!"

"I'm not a WUSS like you are!"

"Technically she belongs to me because I won the darts match."

"SHADDAP SHU."

"Look, right now we're focusing on finding her, right?" The eldest continued. "So stop bitching at eachother."

"WE ARE NOT BITCHING!" They yelled indignantly.

Shu broke a nearby window. "Here, we'll go through like this."

"CHARGEEEEEEEE!"

* * *

Yui's kidnapper thought he heard a battle cry coming from outside his mansion. And also glass shattering. But he dismissed it, probably just the wind.

During his captive's unconscious-ness, he had gone to the length of removing her uniform and burning it in his fire place, then biting her again. Everywhere. What a prick.

He smirked down at all his handiwork. He felt so superior right now.

* * *

"SHU! WHADDAYA DOING?!"

"I'm just resting." The aforementioned blonde replied, making himself comfortable on a couch and fluffing the pillow. "You guys can go get whatsherface."

Ayato and Subaru made their way up the staircase. The very long staircase.

"WHY THE HELL IS THIS THING SO LONG?!"

* * *

Yui's kidnapper snapped to attention. That wasn't the wind. Two people were coming up his staircase. That he just finished _polishing_.

Ooh, if there were _any_ marks, he'd have to slap someone. He walked outside to check who had invaded his humble abode, and his eyes widened at the sight. Lo and behold, Ayato was running towards him! And some other person! Ayato, the source of his undying trauma, was right in front of him!

He didn't get to say the extremely witty line he had spent hours making, because Ayato had already pounced and proceeded to beat the living shit out of him. Such a violent boy.

He stood, satisfied with the result, and Subaru bent down and punched him, because Subaru just liked to punch things, really.

* * *

They came upon a very suspicious looking door. "Perhaps this is the door that contains Yui."

Ayato tried the knob, and when he found it was locked, he resorted to kick it open. Then they finally found the girl they had come for- lying on the floor in her undergarments out cold. With bite-marks all over her body.

"Did I already kill him?" Ayato asked.

"I think he's unconscious."

"Then I'll go and kill him."

One scream of agonising pain later, Ayato returned.

"Wait, are those shackles?"

"How will we get them off?"

Subaru whipped out his handy-dandy knife and, after some struggle, managed to cut the chains.

Ayato bent down, his hands at the ready to scoop Yui up, but Subaru pulled him back. "And what makes you think YOU'LL be the one to carry her?"

"BECAUSE SHE BELONGS TO ME!"

"SHE DOESN'T!"

"YES SHE DOES!"

And thus, despite Subaru's many protests, Ayato emerged victorious from their heated argument. Mainly because Subaru had called him a "B-Baka!" and his rebuttals ground to an awkward, embarrassed halt.

As they made their decent down the staircase, Ayato kept stroking Yui's bitten skin. "I can't believe that bastard did this."

"I can't believe you keep stroking her."

"SHADDUP SUBARU."

When they finally made it to the bottom, Shu was asleep on the couch.

"SHU! WAKE UP!"

"Mngnmnnff."

"OUR MISSION HAS BEEN SUCCESSFUL, SO WE CAN GEDDAHELL OUT!"

Shu reluctantly parted from his comfortable position and stood. He stared at Yui and raised an eyebrow at her questionable attire.

"If we take her outside like this, we'll be tasered." Shu informed them bluntly.

"Feh! We won't get tasered!"

* * *

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THERE WERE POLICE HERE?!"

"I ASSUMED YOU KNEW!"

"HALT MOLESTERS!"

"THEY HAVE TASERS!"

* * *

After running from the police, the rescue squad finally made it back to their better mansion. Ayato heartily slapped Subaru and Shu on their backs. "JOB WELL DONE, TEAM!" He exclaimed as they coughed and choked.

"S-So, who will take Yui back to her room?" Subaru spluttered after semi-recovering.

Shu walked off, secretly scarred by those tasers.

"Well, I am already holding her, so-"

"That's not fair! You got to carry her!"

"It IS fair because SHE BELONGS TO ME!"

"SHE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE YOU!"

"YOU'RE A TSUNDERE!"

Subaru gasped. He couldn't believe that Ayato had pulled out that card. All the brothers had been given their types- megane, shota, possessive, indifferent, uncomfortable-to-be-around. Subaru could clearly remember what they had called him when _his _type was revealed. "Tsunbaru, Tsunbaru!"

And so, Yui was saved (as well as clothed, due to her near naked-ness), and the rescue squad triumphed over the disgruntled revenge-against-Ayato-for-some-unexplained-reason seeking Student Council president.


End file.
